Michel de Montaigne affirmed that, the greatest achievement in the world involves people knowing how to belong. Through the literature published across ‘The Complete Essays’ Michel asserted it is vital for teenagers to acknowledge who they are as individuals. Consequently, children ought to ambitions and ideas on how they can fulfill them effectively as this enables them to know their value as individuals. These notions determine how teenagers gain self esteem. The standard way of thinking regards self-esteem as the way individuals think and feel about themselves. It also encompasses on what the individuals do. Consequently, they ought to determine how well they ought to do tasks enhancing levels of self esteem depending on how important the notion of self esteem is to them. Self-esteem can therefore be summarized as how people think, choose their friends and influence how their family members to think and perceive them (Angela 1).
Children and adults have diverse levels of self esteem as some suffer from either low or elevated self-esteem levels. A healthy self esteem however ought to ensure children value themselves. Thus, they should think and believe they are equally useful, valued, and appreciated members of the society. Children with such a healthy self esteem should be encouraged as this motivates them to identify life targets with potential of developing good and strong skills and abilities. Children identified to have stumpy self-esteem levels also suffer from squat self confidence. Thus, they often feel shameful, embarrassed, sad and mad at themselves as they think that they do not deserve to be loved, valued, appreciated, and accepted in the community. Consequently, they suffer from anxiety which prompts them to be hateful. Social research studies reveal that¸ divorces are major attributes towards children suffering from low self esteem. Lack of love from family members and friends coupled with either illness or death of a loved one also leads children to develop and suffer from low self-esteem levels. These attributes cause low self esteem as they are painful which children associate with failure. Thus, children feeling pain and believing the world is filled with failure cannot achieve a high and healthy self esteem. Thus, parents and guardians ought to fulfill their main and critical responsibility of ensuring their children develop and enhance healthy self esteem levels at an early age (Jim 1).
Some parents however undertake the role of parenting in attempts to ensure their children develop strong and healthy self esteem levels based on misunderstanding of what the self-esteem notion encompasses. In recent times, parents have developed the belief that loving their children involves showering them with praises in order for the children to feel good. The parents however shower children with praises without assessing if they are warranted at that particular period and situation. For example, some parents praise their children if they interrupt when adults are talking claiming the child is striving to achieve self-identity. Thus, they fail to teach children basic manners and respectable skills crucial in ensuring an individual thrives in a society comprising of diverse characters. These misunderstandings have resulted in parents raising selfish and spoiled children (Jim 1).
Parents are also keen on ensuring they do not raise angry and sad children ensuring they attain healthy self esteem. This has encouraged parents to adopt vital measures protecting their children from developing negative emotions. Thus, some parents have been shielding their children from pain by failing to punish them when they engage in disrespectable and delinquent behaviors. For example, some parents can acknowledge their children have participated in a behavioral situation without their permission. Others can also acknowledge their children have been disrespectful to common social and cultural norms and rules intentionally. Such parents however fail to punish their kids as they are convinced reprimands hurt the kids, adversely affecting self-esteem. Ultimately, they fail to understand accomplishments and failures should be applied in imparting self esteem in children. Parents should therefore understand they ought to assist their children in gaining self-esteem by loving and defending them while taking appropriate risks and measures ensuring their behaviors and social skills are impeccable (Ferkany 121).
Encourage children to take appropriate risks while letting them feel failure is vital as it will make them learn something from it and understand every bad and good action has consequences. This however should not overpower parents’ efforts of showing love and friendship as they are equally important to developing children. Guardians and parents however should avoid confusing love with acts of providing incentives something to the children. Instead, they should understand love involves listening, understanding and correcting their kids based on their individual characters and needs. Consequently, parents can understand a healthy self-esteem is vital as it influences how the children will think, act, and belief as they grow up to be respected, valued, and appreciated members of the society (RCN 1).
Positive effects associated with healthy self esteem levels are diverse. Foremost, it encourages children to develop a positive attitude towards individual body images. Thus, teenagers with body issues associated with adolescent cannot develop a high or low self esteem as they understand they are beautiful human beings loved by family and family. High or bloated self esteem levels are not beneficial as it encourages them to develop adverse behaviors and habits. Bloated self esteem encourages children to can be bullies, selfish, and self-absorbed as they believe their actions do not have consequences. Conversely, a low self esteem should be avoided as it encourages such children to be victims of bullying. More so, they fail to develop self confidence crucial in enhancing individual skills and abilities as they lack the will to enhance their hobbies and talents. High and low levels of self esteem therefore do not provide a child with an opportunity to develop into a balanced person (RCN 1).
Parents with misconceptions towards self esteem should therefore strive in identifying when their children have either high or low self esteem levels. Consequently, they ought to assist them in order to develop balanced skills and abilities. They should however acknowledge enrolling children in school is vital as the opportunity will allow them to interact with their peers and seek guidance from their teachers. Consequently, they will be exposed to diverse social settings requiring them to utilize their skills and abilities suitable in each situation with confidence as they have self esteem and a clear understanding of the society. Negative effects associated with low and bloated self esteem levels should therefore be prevented. These effects include; incidences of social and cyberspace bullying, negative body images, failure to either retain or make new friends, and poor performances in school. Parents should therefore be keen in ensuring children attain a strong but healthy self esteem. This will ensure their children acknowledge every action has either a positive or negative consequence depending on care, respect, and understanding applied in undertaking the action (Daniel 1).
Angela, Oswalt. Benefits of Healthy High Self-Esteem. Mental Help Benefits of Healthy High Self Esteem Comments. Web April https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/benefits-of-healthy-high-self-esteem/
Daniel, Schonbuch. Self Esteem: Individuality and Love for Teenagers. Chabad-Lubavitch Media Centre. Web April http://www.chabad.org/blogs/blog_cdo/aid/1190943/jewish/Self-Esteem-Individuality-and-Love-for-Teenagers.htm
Ferkany, Matt. The Educational Importance of Self-Esteem. Journal of Philosophy of Education, 2008, 42(1), 119-132. Print.
Jim, Taylor. Parenting: The Sad Misuse of Self-esteem- Do Your Kids have Real Self Esteem? Psychology Today. Web April https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-power-prime/201002/parenting-the-sad-misuse-self-esteem
Raising Children Network (RCN). Body Image. Teenage Body Image. Raising Children Network Centre for Adolescent Health. Web April http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/body_image.html